Howard Friedman, 1932-2014
Feb. 6th, 2014 09:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
carbonelMy father died this afternoon. As I'd said earlier, he had been in poor health for years, and took a very bad turn a week ago last Monday. He'd been declining a little more every day since then, and I was with him for this last week.
We'd been able to take care of him at the apartment in Boca Raton until last night, but this morning (Thursday), we decided that an in-hospital hospice unit was the best option. The hospice people were wonderful. The visiting nurse arranged the transfer within an hour, the ambulance came and took him there, and the volunteer took us to the family room while his primary care nurse got him settled in.
At that point, we were proceeding on the assumption that while he was definitely dying, it would take a while. My mother talked about bringing a needlepoint tomorrow to work on. I was going to fly back to Minneapolis, and my brother was going to fly in Boca to keep my mother company.
The last post (which was f-locked) ended rather abruptly, because as I was typing it, his breathing changed. He started having periods where he wasn't breathing. Gradually those got longer, and after about 10 minutes, he stopped breathing altogether. My mother and I were at his bedside, and it was very peaceful. Even though he was only at the hospice unit for just over two hours, I'm glad we transferred him there. They took care of everything.
Tomorrow, my mother and I are flying back to Chicago. (We managed to catch my brother on his way to the airport, just in time to change plans. Sometimes I love cell phones.) The funeral will be on Monday at 2 pm, and there will be three days of shiva (yes, I have enough Hebrew to know that's a contradiction in terms). I'll be flying back to Minneapolis on Wednesday evening or Thursday morning.
My thanks to everyone who posted messages of support during this time.
We'd been able to take care of him at the apartment in Boca Raton until last night, but this morning (Thursday), we decided that an in-hospital hospice unit was the best option. The hospice people were wonderful. The visiting nurse arranged the transfer within an hour, the ambulance came and took him there, and the volunteer took us to the family room while his primary care nurse got him settled in.
At that point, we were proceeding on the assumption that while he was definitely dying, it would take a while. My mother talked about bringing a needlepoint tomorrow to work on. I was going to fly back to Minneapolis, and my brother was going to fly in Boca to keep my mother company.
The last post (which was f-locked) ended rather abruptly, because as I was typing it, his breathing changed. He started having periods where he wasn't breathing. Gradually those got longer, and after about 10 minutes, he stopped breathing altogether. My mother and I were at his bedside, and it was very peaceful. Even though he was only at the hospice unit for just over two hours, I'm glad we transferred him there. They took care of everything.
Tomorrow, my mother and I are flying back to Chicago. (We managed to catch my brother on his way to the airport, just in time to change plans. Sometimes I love cell phones.) The funeral will be on Monday at 2 pm, and there will be three days of shiva (yes, I have enough Hebrew to know that's a contradiction in terms). I'll be flying back to Minneapolis on Wednesday evening or Thursday morning.
My thanks to everyone who posted messages of support during this time.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 02:41 am (UTC)*sends so many hugs*
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 02:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 02:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:07 am (UTC)Condolences
Date: 2014-02-07 03:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 03:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 04:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 04:36 am (UTC)B&K gave me the sad news over dinner, which eased the way for reading it here. Even when you know it's coming, it's different when it's real. I'm glad hospice was so responsive today, that you had their support, and that your father's passing was peaceful.
May your flight to Chicago be smooth, and may the coming hours and days treat you all as gently as possible.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 04:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 05:02 am (UTC)P.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 05:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 05:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 06:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 07:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 07:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 08:02 am (UTC)Condolences
Date: 2014-02-07 08:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 08:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 08:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 08:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 09:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 09:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 11:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 11:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 01:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 01:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 02:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 05:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 06:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 06:46 pm (UTC)Condolences. I'm glad the timing worked out for you to be there.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 10:56 pm (UTC)Glad the hospice people were so good, and that he went gently.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-07 11:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-08 01:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-08 02:57 am (UTC)Hugs and comfort to you and yours.
K.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-13 10:11 pm (UTC)Thank you for your note. I really appreciate it.
no subject
Date: 2014-02-08 05:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-02-08 11:44 am (UTC)*hugs*
Date: 2014-02-12 08:40 pm (UTC)- D